Music

On my dad's side of the family, there used to be yearly family reunions (until the last remaining sibling died). At these gatherings, a few of the girls (ladies, really) would break out the violins, gather 'round the piano and play some of the favorite songs that "Grandma and Grandpa" sang and played. All of the twelve original children in this family knew these tunes quite well, and now a few of their children and grandchildren had learned the music to play at reunions in remembrance of "the good 'ol days!" There would even be a little dance included if the mood was right. At one of these reunions, when the music was played, I inquired about how to get a copy of this music to play for my children and keep for posterity (and because they were really quite fun to listen to). There didn't seem to be any written or recorded copies available. No one had been able to get it on a CD, tape recorder, or sheet music. I was really saddened because it seemed to be such an important part of my family's history, and it would be lost to all the descendants if it didn't get passed on to the rest of the children and grandchildren.

Music has always been a part of my dads family's history, so it should be included with a book of remembrance, or listed in journals; but because there's no "hard copy" to add, it looks like it's a piece of the puzzle that's missing; at least, for now.

This experience caused me to look at my own family and gather our favorite music together. When my children were young (16 and younger), we learned a few songs and would sing them at different times before a congregation at church. The children weren't too excited about it, but it was one of those "Mom" things that is required in our family. They do it because Mom says to, and hopefully something positive was gained by these experiences.

Whenever a piece of music can be included in a book, journal, or history, it helps us to know that family member better, tying us to him/her even more.

BIG questions, little questions...

The challenge of writing a life history about a family member, be it a spouse, parent, grandparent, or extended family member, is quite overwhelming. Where to begin? So many experiences, so many memories. When you can get a family member to sit still for more than a few minutes, ask some big questions like, "Where/when were you born?" "How many children were in your family?" "What do you remember about your childhood?" Have your relative elaborate and give specifics about these questions, like where was your first home, how many times did you move, what are your earliest memories of your home, etc.

One place to get some detailed questions to ask is from www.chipin.com/genealogy/family_history_questions.htm, entitled "Family History Questions."

To record your own memories, use these questions as prompts, and you'll fill up a notebook real quick! But what a great personal history!

Family cookbook, again!

Another note about cookbooks. Visit www.cookbookpeople.com and see how to create your own family cookbook. You can either upload your recipes to a cookbook stored online, or....you can buy their CD that shows you how to create a cookbook to print at home on your own printer. There's a scrapbook/cookbook section to add delightful tidbits of personality from each chef to each recipe. Quite interesting, and very well worth the time to explore!

This is what its all about!

A Favorite Cookbook

What a great idea, adding a few old family favorite recipes to your collection of journals and family history! Usually, cookbooks are kept separate from genealogy and family history, and are in their own category. But what a nice surprise to find, while reading a passage in a journal, a recipe that was cherished by a family member. We have several favorites in our family, used especially at family dinners. One is Potato Salad which, I hear, tastes better than most other potato salads. Another is a cottage cheese/whipped topping salad we call, affectionately, "Fluff" - a term my mother created for its fluffy, smooth, creamy texture. Our family specialties are: Banana Bread, Cinnamon rolls, Homemade white bread, Chocolate Peanut Butter Bars, and much more. (There were quite a few, once I got to thinking about it!) Here's our potato salad recipe:

8 medium size potatoes, boiled, peeled
12 eggs, hard boiled, shelled
1/4 cup onion, finely diced
1/4 cup sweet relish
1 to 1-1/2 cups mayonnaise
seasoning salt, to taste
black pepper, to taste

Into a large mixing bowl, cut potatoes into medium size chunks. Finely chop eggs and add to potatoes. Add remaining ingredients and mix well. Season with seasoning salt and pepper to taste. Adjust quantities as needed for consistency and taste. Chill in refrigerator for at least 2 hours, or overnight. Serves 8-10.

Cookbooks are a great way to get to know an ancestors personality. Include recipes wherever you can in personal and family histories. And since each family has a different "take" on the same recipes, no two family's Potato Salad, or "Fluff" will be the same, which makes each family unique!

Get it All

A family history book is a collection of important, and even trivial, family information. A "Book of Remembrance" is more specifically charts and forms, with written histories and some pictures. A family history book can be put together to include a list of immediate family members, birthdates, birthplaces, pictures of the home, the address, pictures of vacations, tokens from memorable occasions, all with written descriptions, of course, and whatever else seems appropriate.

Become "snap happy" with the camera and include pictures of anything and everything (they can be sorted out later). Take pictures of where you live, best friends, favorite things, a meal around the dinner table, ...everything!

Gather souveniers from wherever you go: receipts from anniversary restaurants, movie ticket stubs, napkins from receptions, flyers from vacation spots, a leaf or flower from a car trip.....but you might want to leave that tiny bar of soap back at the hotel! You'll end up with enough "stuff" to fill a few books, but that's what family history is all about. Just keep gathering mementos from wherever you go and add it.

Our trip to Wyoming made up a bulging, 2", three ring binder filled with pages of pictures, newspapers, receipts, wrappers, etc., all with descriptions and captions - and that was just one trip! What fun it is to get that book out and remind us of the fun we had! Imagine the effect it will have on the grandchildren, and great-grandchildren to see our adventures!

There doesn't have to be a special occasion to document your history. A trip to the grocery store reveals the everyday life you have. Your shopping list and the receipt, the current ads, and your written description of your experience, including who you saw and what you thought, sheds light on your current circumstances for readers now and in the future.

Once you've put together a collection of stuff, big or small, and put it in a binder or folder, you begin to train your eye for future items to include in another binder or folder. Sure, in the end (if there is an end), you could have boxes and boxes of binders, books, folders, etc., of family experiences. But what a cherished history you've compiled for your posterity!

So gather anything and everything! Get it All!

"Say Cheese!"

It's true, a picture is worth a thousand words. Whether creating a family history book, a pedigree chart, scrapbook (where pictures are essential), or journal, adding pictures, artwork, sketches, etc. add a more complete element.
In a few pedigree charts I've seen (both from long ago, and most recent), pictures were added next to the names. This is especially helpful when you're not familiar with a particular family member. Those great-aunts and uncles from another part of the country or world are much more easily identifiable with their picture by their name, rather than just reading their name on the page. Even though the pedigree chart pictures are just from the neck up and they're tiny, it's enough to see a family resemblance. In a family history book, pictures big and small can add more detail than words can give. Expensive portraits aren't necessary to add in a family collection, although they could be included. Long ago, pictures were taken and printed on tin plates. Sure, they lasted a long time, but they also bent and faded. Regular snapshots work great. An inexpensive disposable camera does the job just fine.
However, with all the technology of digital quality, color-enhancing, blemish-hiding, red-eye eliminating, cropping to size, etc., there isn't much of an excuse anymore NOT to add pictures to a collection of family history.

Scrapbook-mania

With the popularity of scrapbooking, you now have the choice to make your journal as fancy or simple as you like. Going "scrapbook style" can actually make journaling more fun. Scrapbooks always include pictures, receipts of travels, programs from important events, and tokens from special places. Special papers in all designs as backgrounds, paper frames for pictures, buttons, ribbons, stickers, and glues all add to the charm of a scrapbook. So much creativity can be put into a scrapbook trying to reflect an event, that it can easily be overdone with "fluff" and not include as much information. There are usually more "do-dads" than written details in a scrapbook, but nonetheless, it is considered a record or journal.

If scrapbooking seems easier and will be more fun than handwriting, typing, or recording, then, that would be the thing to do. Keep in mind, though, that scrapbooking can be expensive.

Personal Journal or Life Sketch

Along with the challenge of building a pedigree chart, as outlined in the previous post, is the not-so-exciting task of writing in a journal. However, some of us view a journal as an easy way to record experiences and create a history for ourselves, which can prove valuable when we need to remember details from the past. Journals become especially cherished when the author has deceased or when memories fade. On the other hand, some of us view a journal as a time-consuming, labor-intensive waste. "Who's going to want to read about me, anyway?......I'm not that special!" "I'm not so important that I need to write down everything I do," "I don't like diaries!" "Who really cares?" My feelings exactly!...................until I read some family life sketches. Then I changed my way of thinking.

One of the women I read about in a book of remembrance that was compiled many years ago (who's life was recorded in many paragraphs), had a full life, was quite talented, and was well liked by everyone.

Another woman, who I'm sure had just as full a life, had for her legacy, a three-sentence paragraph describing, in the most simple language, her entire existence here on earth. I realized, then, that even though I greatly disliked recording events, feelings, and life happenings, the need for a record of my existence was of importance to me. I wanted to be remembered for being more than just a name on a paper.

So, how and where do you begin? "The beginning of time" is always too far back to try to catch up on, so start with today by writing a few things you're going to do, or have already done, either with pen and paper, or on a keyboard. Awkward? YES, at first; but as you get going, and add more detail describing where you are, who you're speaking about, and what's going on, you'll find it a bit easier to keep writing. This is one of those things that gets better with practice. Many a "first journal" gets tossed in the garbage only to be rewritten later.

The point is, just start! If pen and paper are too slow, and a keyboard isn't user friendly, a voice recorder can be the answer. This is especially helpful when acquiring information from an older person who has lots of memories, and lots of experiences. Recording random memories and thoughts, you can capture a personality that is unmatched on paper. The inflection in their voice reveals emotions that paint a true picture of who this person really is. Prioritizing later, you can gather stories on a recorder and either keep the recording, and/or transcribe it into a journal or book of remembrance.

Talking into a microphone may seem strange in the beginning, but look at it this way: with the new technology of the cell phone ear bud, people appear to be talking to themselves as they walk down a grocery store aisle or sidewalk. Just like the beginnings of almost anything, using a voice recorder will take some getting used to and lots of practice.

Again, the point is, just start!

The Pedigree Chart

A pedigree chart, or family tree, consists of one persons name as the starting point and adding fathers' and mothers' names, which quickly multiplies as generations are recorded. The best place to start is with YOU. After you record your full name in the first position on the pedigree chart, write your parents' names in the next positions. List grandparents names next, adding great-grandparents on the chart as well. Ideally, adding birth dates and birth places, along with death dates and death places helps to complete your pedigree chart. While gathering all this information, notice reactions of family members: it's odd how recording your own dates and those of close family seems intrusive and tabu, but the more distant the relative, the more informational and less personal. Interesting!

Gathering family information can be fun but challenging. Most of the time, asking Mom or Dad for their parents' names, and possibly their grandparents names' is the easiest way to build a family tree. However, there may be situations where the information isn't known or is sketchy. Dad may only know his grandmother came from Sweden, but not which city; or Mom remembers her grandpa from the midwest, but doesn't really know where any other relatives came from. Searching geographical areas where the last known relative lived, you'll want to locate any information that would be considered "official;" meaning birth records, death records, census records, military service records, journals, etc. These documents not only provide the name of your searchee, but may include other family names and other information as well. For instance, a birth record will include father's and mothers' names and their birthplaces, and will also have addresses and dates.

Mobile Society

Up until about forty years ago, our society seemed relatively stable: meaning families stayed in the same neighborhood until the children were grown, or at least until they finished high school and moved away to go to college or a university. Extended family lived relatively close and ties were stronger. Children really knew their grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. Family dinners and reunions were either excitedly anticipated or dreadfully attended. Nevertheless, they were opportunities to renew ties. When available, great-grandparents were included in the associations.
Today, a variety of circumstances cause separation of families: employment opportunities, education, cost of living, etc. Even health concerns prompt changes in the family: moving closer to that medical facility or specialist; weather more suited to the family, whether moving from the heat to the snow, or from the snow to the heat; allergies, etc.
Whatever the reasons for change, families often struggle with the desire to retain their ties with extended relatives and maintain their immediate family structure. The idea of "I'm my own universe" dominates, and family units stay in bubbles, until they join with the rest of the family.
As a result, many people don't know their cousins, aunts, or even grandparents. It's like a tree with very little root, just sitting on the surface of the ground.

A SENSE OF BELONGING/THE BIGGER PICTURE
Because of these changes, the depth and stability of what it means to be a family fades away. A "cousin" is replaced by the friend next door; a "grampa" becomes that nice older man with white hair who always smiles and says hi; a "sister" might be a co-worker to be confided in.
Family associations are important to find balance in one's life, and extended family is essential to adding to that balance. The more one involves themself in immediate family activities and extended family events, the more depth is created. The tree extends it roots deep into the ground which causes the top of the tree to flourish and become stronger.
However, there are circumstances which simply do not allow families and extended families to associate, whether in person, by phone, mail, internet, etc. Where, then, can one still feel a sense of belonging to their family? The answer would be in looking back towards our relatives who've died. Just because they're not standing in front of us doesn't mean they didn't exist. Stories were told about them, laughs were shared, and memories created because of them. The more information that is learned adds to their reality as an individual, and the more meaning is given to their name.
So whether our relatives are living now, or have passed on, we can take advantage of becoming closer to them through building a history. The most common way of doing this is by starting simple - build a pedigree chart.